There are things that I would do differently if I were to parent Meg and Matt again.  As Matt said last night, he tells people that his mother "did the best she could".

Funny guy.

One thing I would do the same is introduce my kids to THAT kind of humor...and God....and the world.

One thing I would do differently is 'lift' them up a little more.  I so value humility that I think, even though I was not overly critical, I may not have 'bragged on' my children enough.  I can see it in how they tend to minimize their accomplishments, etc.

I feel concern over that even though I know that I am still 'wired' that way.

I am sure it is why I am less apt to write about me and mine.

I worry that it will be boring or annoying or, well, just too much.

So, this is a step for me to share.

While driving home from Matt and Shellie's and spending time with them as well as with Meg and Adam, I was struck with the shift in dynamics from many years ago when they first met each other and had to figure out how to BE together.

There was, as in many families, STUFF to work through...mostly, small stuff....but also, some big stuff...and all the stuff in between...you know, life STUFF!

There were times when I thought...hmmmmm, is this gonna' work for all the players?

I also thought....and still do....that what I felt/thought/wanted mattered not because this was about THEM, not ME.

Often, it seems that parents of adult children still parent as they did when their now ADULTS were still children.

Not. A. Good. Idea.

just sayin'...

Anyway, the years passed and there was that shift I mentioned earlier.  Not only were they without angst, they were building a relationship.

Now they are clearly friends.

I blog it because I want to do what I didn't do enough of when they were younger.  I want all four of them to know that I admire and respect how they have intentionally chosen to be more than family.

They have chosen to be friends.

Oh, they may not DO everything the same or THINK the same or BE the same but that is not the point.

The point is that they value the relationship MORE than the STUFF!

So, they are DOING it.

They are BEING together.

And their kids are seeing that relationships can trump stuff and love can win.

Way cool.

Lots of living left to do for all of them...more STUFF that will come....but with this intentional base of BEING, they can continue to bless and be blessed by each other. 

They have all blessed me.

Thank you, Matt and Meg and Shell and Adam.